The Khadeejah “The wise backbone” ( Four Great Women Series Part 3.1)

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 Recently a series of studies at the University of Iowa  suggests that “supportive” has almost as many interpretations as ”commitment” or “love.”  For instance, a five year study of 103 newly married husbands and wives identified four kinds of support: Physical comfort and Emotional support (listening and empathising, taking your spouse’s hand, giving your spouse a hug), Esteem support (expressing confidence in your partner, providing encouragement), Informational support (giving advice, gathering information), and Tangible support (taking on responsibilities so your spouse can deal with a problem, helping to brainstorm solutions to a problem).

holding-hands( women and men equal completeness)

It is common that couples in though economical times have to support each other. However Britain’s divorce rate is the highest in Europe. The number of divorces throughout the EU is on the increase, with an average of 1.8 divorces for every 1,000 people. But in Britain and in Finland the rate is 2.8 divorces per 1,000, compared with just 0.6 per 1,000 in Luxembourg.

Britain is well above the 26% EU average rate, at 38.8%. The 500-page survey, compiled by the EU’s Eurostar statistical office in Luxembourg, reveals that total health spending by governments in the EU is on average less than half the rate in America – and the rate in Britain lower than anywhere in the EU apart from Ireland, Portugal, Spain and Greece. These findings reflect the environment we live in.

These are the conditions society has to deal with. Couples are faced with new sets of problems, and Muslim are not exempt from it. In a society where people wont hesitate to divorce, corruption is pre-destined. There are distinct forces that instigate conflicts between married couples. There are external morals and internal ones that have been installed to the belief system of the women and men. It is all manipulation. The media plays a huge role, Beyoncé’s “We run the world”  attitude  or philosophy of a “Bad Bitch“. As far as man’s role in society ,he changed the role of being a provider and caretaker.
holding-hands(Men and Women  equal completeness)
He, the man instead choose to prey on victims before he is preyed on. Government institutions create a safety nets for women with a double agenda.  They encourage women to crush their own families by stripping away  the conservative family structure. The male is only needed to procreate and real fatherhood is becoming a thing of the past. In 2001 a study on Psychological Effects of Partner Abuse Against Men, Denise A. Hines and Kathleen Malley- Morrison outline abusive relationship between men and women. The paper consisted of statics or previous research and interviews. One statement supports the notion, that indeed the way society is structured women are clearly indoctrinated by these exaggerated feminist ideas.
She is being taught to get married and to divorce for financial reason. Most of these women are the ones who are the lowest in society.  And the biggest losers become the emotionally broken children throughout the process.. The following text is taking from a male interviewee

She ran off with another man, but after a short time returned home. I was told, principally by lawyers, that I must take her back. For if I pressed a divorce action, she would be seen as a poor, aggrieved, helpless woman, and she would literally clean me out. She could get eighty-five percent of my income and have our five children entrusted in her care. (Langley & Levy, 1977, p. 191)

One of the Four great women was the exact opposite. She belonged to noblest of the society, she was really wealthy and well-known. ” The pure and Chaste One”, the nobles among the Quraish addressed her in that manner. Considering that Islam had not even arrived on the Arabian peninsula and girls were still buried alive. Who was this women that could reject all chieftain of Quraish and uphold such a strong position ? even as widow.
9162852-male-body-backbone-scan( Without a backbone you could not stand up at all.
They also protect your spinal cord and nerves from damage and are a direct path to the brain)
 Khadeejah bint Khuwailid( may Allah be pleased with her) the woman who climbed  high levels. She was the woman who realized that there could only be one man in her life. A man who possessed a wonderful character, nobility, trustworthiness and truthfulness. She as strong business woman
was looking for someone she could trust, someone of a good character.
The Prophet Muhammad PBUH,  was at that time the only man available with these traits. However why is she (RA) included to be one of the best women in entire History, and where can we all learn from her?

The first lesson here is that she appreciated what she had and showed gratitude. When she heard about The Prophet SAAS she managed to get him  ( SAAS) to work for her ( R.A) to do some business in asham upon the journey.

Maisarah a servant of Khadeejah reports about the extraordinary things he experienced whilst being  with the not -yet -Prophet Muhammad at that time . The incident with the monk described the Prophet Muhammad  PBUH, as the coming Prophet. The Angels that gave shade to The Prophet SAAS, and his noble Character all these things compelled Khadeejah to propose.


The Khadeejah R.A the woman we know, love and admire was born out the struggle the early Muslim were going through. She became the  best among them because she was the immediate person that the Prophet PBUH,  would fall back after an unsuccessful day of preaching to his own people. She did not discard her affection towards her husband and stayed true to herself. At times when everyone declared her husband as  a liar, mad man or just deluded her love almost doubled untenable.

The direct respond was that she bear him six children and continued to be wife and friend any male or female would wish for.  Nothing seemed to deter her from being the wife of the most hated man in the town. Again a distinct trend must become clear to all of us. While discussing the third Great women one characteristic becomes evident.

If we were to summarise one attribute without contemplating too profound about it would outstandingly be standing against the social norm. She would be considered anarchist during the  French renaissance. Communist or capitalist during the cold war depending from which viewpoint you see it . In modern terms unwilling to integrate into customs and practices.

Khadeejah indeed was one of the best human that walked on this earth because of her support that she developed at times most of us would abandon the idea being with someone like the Prophet PBUH, . Historically speaking there are two major examples  that i am aware of and two different times of her (R.A) life.

Fifteen years into the marriage, something strange happened. Little did Khadeejah R.A and The Prophet PBUH  knew, their life would turn tables 360 degree. The Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam came to her with his heart trembling  in the middle of the night apprehensive and disturbed after seeing things from a world unknown to him  at that time. The first Revelation as we know it.  He informed her of the happening and said to her, “O Khadijah what has happened to me? I fear for myself?….
Let us take pause here and truly appreciate why she has to be one of the greatest. The following sentences will reveal why. Remember people may say well it is about her, and not helping others like Mother Teresa. We don’t deny that she is notably the women of our century that dedicated her life for humanitarian causes. However MotherTeresa had Crisis of faith for over a decade and felt empty from inside, which leads us to the powerful respond of Khadeejah which was filled with conviction that would explode mountains.
Cave Hira
He informed her of the happening and said to her, “O Khadijah what has happened to me? I fear for myself?.She replied: “It can’t be. Be happy. I swear by Allah that he will never humiliate you. By Allah, you join ties of relationship, you speak the truth, you bear people’s burdens, you help the destitute, you entertain guests and you help the vicissitudes which affect the people.” 
Imam an-Nawawi, who wrote the commentary on Sahih Muslim said that the scholars have explained Khadijah’s statement by saying that she knew that Allah would never allow one who had been given such a generous character and noble manners by Him, to be affected by madness, since good manners is itself such a blessing from Allah.
 So if we add it all up she was his greatest source of comfort, the first to offer security. She was the first to believe in him, and who could have known him better? After all, she had been married to him for fifteen years. A moment of epiphany. This means that the first Muslim after the advent of the Prophet SAS was a women. How paradox it sounds consider the connotations for a Muslim women.
For the skeptics  you may  think “we keep hearing her being supportive and over generous”. “She was only a subservient women like you Muslim men prefer it”. Well not this time if you assume so. These were the prerequisite to attained real greatness that reached until the times of Jane Austen. The noble Quran tells us
O you who wraps himself [in clothing],Arise [to pray] the night, except for a little Half of it – or subtract from it a little. Or add to it, and recite the Qur’an with measured recitation. Indeed, We will cast upon you a heavy word.Indeed, the hours of the night are more effective for concurrence [of heart and tongue] and more suitable for words[ 73: 1-6]
O you who covers himself [with a garment]Arise and warn, And your Lord glorify,And uncleanliness avoid, And do not confer favor to acquire more, But for your Lord be patient. [ 74:1-7]
The  Holy Prophet PBUH, is addressed in this verse with reference to a particular style of wrapping himself in his clothes. The first revelation in the cave of hira  being his first  experience , he felt it very hard , and was caught by a shivery cold  once he reached home , he asked his blessed wife Khadeejah to wrap him in a blanket which she did. Some narrations have reported another event:When the holy Prophet ( PBUH) was accused by the pagans of Mecca , of being magician who separated between friends, he felt aggrieved, and wrapped himself in his clothes out of grief. Addressing him with reference to these events is loving style adopted by Allah ( سبحانه و تعالى) to console him.
( Muhammad Taqi Usmani)
Many scholars consider these above mentioned verse one of the first verses ever revealed to mankind.The revelation would come at specific times and occasion. Some of the revelation would always have a context. looking into the context we something striking. When Allah  سبحانه و تعالى addressees the Prophet ” O you who wraps himself [in clothing],Arise [to pray]. Khadeejah becomes a witness and is the first human being after the Prophet to have the knowledge. When we look at the verse we see instruction. So Allah سبحانه و تعالى choose to reveal the verse whilst the  Noble Prophet was with his wife. This magnifies the position Khadeejah had. She also had been entrusted with the sacred knowledge. Islam was about male and female from the beginning. If we compare a similar situation occurred between Adam and Huwwa (MPBUT).
However, why do we claim that the first feminist literature movement was a result of the first revelation above mentioned. To be continued in part 2  of Khadeejah R.A , the wise backbone 3.2

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Mary, the mother of Motherhood and more (Four Great Women Series Part 2.1)

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In today’s society equality for the female is sought through materialistic means. Feminist want to close the gap that exist between male and female by opposing the so called Patriarchal system. The women today challenges the status Quo because they are not part of it. Has an egalitarian society in that sense ever existed ? are there possibilities for the existence of such a society ?. Let us set the premises for such an argument and have a holistic approach for it.

Politician and “Green Party” Leader Natalie Benette debated in may earlier this year at the Oxford union. She argued against the motion( We are all feminist) using the FIFA analogy :stating that FIFA would not allow women to play with men even if they have the ability, and therefore we as society are far away from being a complete feminist society.I’ll pose the question and ask would it be equally fair then to have professional man to play in a women football league ? The emphasis here lies on the women that has the ability to play in male dominated football league. The answers to the question is the answer to the roots of all contemporary contentions, hold by the Neo-feminist movement. How can you treat something equal when they are different initially ?


Internchange is not going to enumerate the differences rather use commonalities that can make man and woman equal in a way people tend to neglect. Make both genders equal in a sense without omitting the undeniable nature of a woman. Mary the mother of Jesus notorious modesty and spirituality became an example for many generations. All of these achievement at the tender age of twelve. We want to eradicate the believe that Women are lost if they carry babies, especially if the father is not there.  We live in a society that weakens the Motherhood. Shall this be an empowerment to the Single mothers out there “you have an enormous force behind you”. Let us all together guard our chastity receive the honour believe in words of our lord, and obey him devoutly. Sounds simple in incredibly hard times. The noble Qur’an says

And [the example of] Mary, the daughter of ‘Imran, who guarded her chastity, so We blew into [her garment] through Our angel, and she believed in the words of her Lord and His scriptures and was of the devoutly obedient. ( 66:12)


This verse is so powerful and gives us an inside of the historical context of the situation. ALLAH سبحانه و تعالى defends  Mary( May Peace be upon her) at a time allegation were flying like bullets. What really blows my mind is that the verse, although used as a moral guideline and yardstick  to attain superiority over others fulfils its purpose of defending her in one verse.

Mary and the family

As we discussed in the previous episode of “The Four Great Women ” women are mothers to a nation. This notion has died during the 60’s due to the contribution of the likes of Gloria Steinmem,Bella Abzug and Betty Friedan. In this article we will present a solution for the dilemma of the modern woman. We are going to look at how important motherhood is in harsh conditions, and appreciate the qualities of a woman.The remedy and the real liberation lies in the ability to forget about male and female. ALLAH  سبحانه و تعالى make this clear by using Mariam (MPBUH) The mother of ISA ( jesus MPBUH), as an example to follow as mentioned in similar Correlation with Asiyah (MPBUH).

Mariam (MPBUH)  also known as Mary or the Mother of Isa (jesus MPBUH) is a key figure in the history and is known for many qualities. We want to Understand why she was mentioned by the messenger of Allah ( سبحانه و تعالى ) as being the mother of a nation and one  out of the Four great women. What can we learn from her ?. Let the article speak for itself  ,and express empowerment. People tend to overlook the weight Mariam  (MPUBH) personality holds. Although to fully understand we must look at the bigger picture

The Noble Quran tells us

But when she delivered her, she said,

“My Lord, I have delivered a female.” And Allah was most knowing of what she delivered, “And the male is not like the female. And I have named her Mary, and I seek refuge for her in You and [for] her descendants from Satan, the expelled [from the mercy of Allah ].”  3:36

( Baitul Magdis )  3824457783_596e61094d_o

These are the words  of Mariam’s mother. What is so interesting about the statement Mariam’s mother makes, is that she was expecting a boy to carry on the legacy.The believe that only man were fit for purpose  refuted by ALLAH (he exalted is he) as he deliberately chooses to respond  to her prayer by giving her a daughter instead of a boy.Furthermore we can see that there are differences between male and female. This might be one of the biggest evidences that Islam does not discriminate against genders. Another example for superiority and Wisdom in the Qur’an over human reasoning.

Mariam’s mothers took her to the Mosque of Baitul Magdis, and talked to the care taker and worshippers at the mosque. Zechariah Mariam’s cousin was of them. He later won custody over her.The mother took charge and her say had weight in a male dominated society.

The household  Mariam( MPBUH) was raised will reveal how such a great character was developed. Her father Imran  died before her birth.This formed an even stronger individual. Lebron james says similar

” Being the only man in the household with my mom definitely helped me grow up fast”

This is also would apply to Mariam ( Mary MPBUH) and her mother who vowed during her pregnancy that she would let the newborn serve Baitul Maqdis. In the religious code of earlier Prophets, there was a method of worship through which a child, out of one’s children, could be freed  from all worldly services and devoted exclusively for Allah سبحانه و تعالى .

. ALLAH سبحانه و تعالى , out of his consideration for the sincerity Mariam mother accepted that very girl and thereby made her status distinct from any other girl of the world.

From here we learn that a mother holds a certain measure of guardianship over her child  in respect of his or her education and training. Mariam’s mother would have never vowed  if the mother had no right of guardianship over child,


The noble Quran says:

So her Lord accepted her with good acceptance and caused her to grow in a good manner and put her in the care of Zechariah. Every time Zechariah entered upon her in the prayer chamber, he found with her provision. He said “O Mary, from where is this [coming] to you?” She said, “It is from Allah. Indeed, Allah provides for whom He wills without account.” 3:37

This verse gives us insight on how convicted Mariam (MPBUH ) was as an individual . She invested her entire energy into the worship.The worship that lead to liberation. Worship which channelled her energy into positivity. We want you to critically examine this fraction. She became more confident and independent by worshipping Allah سبحانه و تعالى. is it merely the effect of placebo or something more profound. Young female have the ability to generate extra energy which could be linked to the fact that women have traditionally been care takers of their own homes, which required enormous energy. This type of energy is still  detectable in our society .This type of energy today is translated into performances, as widespread of studies suggest that young female outperform male in educational institution such as universities.

So where does the energy come from, and what else will we learn from such a great women. The answer to that and more will be revealed in  “Mary,The mother of Motherhood and more 2.2”

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The Four Great Women Serie, the only soulution in the 21st century an Introduction

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Narrated Anas [may Allah be pleased with him]:
that the Prophet () said: “Sufficient for you among the women of mankind are Mariam bint ‘Imran, Khadijah bint Khuwailid, Fatimah bint Muhammad and Asiyah the wife of Fir’awn.”
English reference  : Vol. 1, Book 46, Hadith 3878, Grade Sahih, Darusalam
 We all heard numerous stories about them. Their historical legacy embedded in our minds, yet almost forgotten. “The Four Great Women” function as Shining examples for both male and female, female and male, djinns and humans. They represented dynamic personalities that reacted in a situation of  black despair extraordinary well. These women have been elevated surpassingly to high ranks, by exceeding their capacities and embracing the fact they were women. “Strong Women”, in Male dominated social systems, where authority constituted male supremacy and women were regarded as subordinated.

All four women have outstandingly paradigm shifted whole nations,with pure simplicity. They knew, to be on the safe side, their spirituality had to be nurtured and the relationship with their creator, had to intensify constantly.The Life lesson they experienced exhibited their abilities to perform better than most of us . The attempt to strive, for the one thing everyone else seemed to ignore and disregard. They made sacrifices and lead by example. Today their qualities are urgently needed

.muslim-women682_430329a(Four Strong Muslima may Allah Strengthen our sister across the globe)

Needed in a time where leading figures and institutes misguided the modern women, and she subsequently, became a battle ground for a proxy war.To many stakeholders, and geopolitical interest in the affair of the Women. This battle is so destructive that the outcome will lead to obliteration of the family structure,hence progressive society by any means. The exploitation of the woman. Women from all backgrounds, nations and classes targeted. The so-called rescue of the oppressed women, especially Muslimah. Liberty from religion and ancient traditions.  Who are the people who want to disable and paralyse the womanhood ?. A good question to ask, as false beliefs  are still propagated and promoted. Euphemisms the key component, when modernisation is marketed as an ideology and not a condition which naturally finds its ways into a society.


They replaced the truth with false idols and ideals. They produced puppets to be followed, and used the struggle of the woman as an Opportunity to conquer and divide the family. For the one  who divides families, he has the ability to destroy nations. The equation is simple distract the Fathers, brainwash the children and tell the mother she has to be liberated  from all of her misery. Welcome to the 21st century, a dysfunctional society, with Dysfunctional individuals. Why and how the women plays such an important role will become clear along the journey to the past. A wise woman once said don’t kill yourself in the present for the past mistakes, a wiser woman answered and said ” then stick to something that neither of both”. So where do we have to look for timeless solutions and examples, regardless of their race and class? We suggest a book that expresses itself in manner that is completely different to us. This source of guidance is holistic and offers us guarantee for a lifetime.

This is the Book about which there is no doubt, a guidance for those conscious of Allah ( Surah Baqarah : 2)

The four great women have been mentioned in the holy Qur’an and some in the bible and other historical records. Whether it is Aasiyah the wife of the tyrant Pharaoh, whose earthly sense of pain disappeared,  Mariam the mother of Isa ( jesus may be peace upon him) who was strong in a time of vulnerabilities.

pharo( relief on a egyptian wall with a god a pharaoh an his wife)

Khadeejah the wife of the Prophet Muhammad (  صلى الله عليه (وسلم  whose support moved mountains and  the best woman of her time and Fatima bint Rassul (  صلى الله عليه وسلم‎ )  the daughter of the prophet may peace be upon them all have surpassed any women in excellence for various of reasons and represent beacon of light for the women and men in its entirety. “The four great women” article series are going to be published in four articles.

The stories might be of the past, but they are certainly not obsolete in the 21st century. Internchange’s aim to dissolve the rusted shackles of the old ignorant. Although the problems are only reshaped, rearranged, remolded, the answers remain the same.

Damsel in distress still vibrant within literature and the entertainment industry, which complements the sexual imagery of the women in the magazines. The struggle continues for the women socially and economically. Waiting for a utopia in a world that does not posses the characteristics of  Sir Thomas More’s Utopia. Instead emptiness promoted unknowingly and partly supported by the innocent women. Emptiness in actuality the cause of the intellectual evaporation and the eradication of the spiritual well-being, created a society that is slowly dying. A void that can only be filled with one form of “nutrition”. ” Emaan” which is bestowed upon the one who seeks it, is the “food of soul”. However revaluation the situation we see that most of the void replaced with exhaustive demands that create delayed gratification pattern which fail to fully bring joy ,peace and harmony. We all need to ask ourself or each other ” Are you Famined ” ?


Have you reached a level where your soul or the void remains undernourished and lacks the right substance ? have you reached the stage where you claimed to use logic but emotion overtook by far and you did not recognize it instantly or not even at all.

“Whether you hide your word or publish it. He certainly has full knowledge of the secrets of all hearts. He is the One that understands the finest mysteries and is well-acquainted with them.” (Surat al-Mulk, 67:13-14)

Al Mussawir ( the fashioner) undoubtedly know what we inhabit in our souls and He (exalted is he ) only knows the perfect answer to Sigmund Freud quote ”  what does a women want ?”

Everyone wants to be treated well, everyone wants to have equal rights. Are we all proportionally judged and  measured accordingly.What are equal rights. Who sets those rights, and why are we still debating whether feminism is a good thing or not.

In the meantime we should take a pause and wait for greatness to come if (Allah wills)  for the greatest source of power, wisdom and knowledge. We should wait for the massive spectacle to unfold and blossom like lotus flower in mid August. The beauty of the history and the legacy that  these women from the past left are way too notorious to just fade away in this wild wide world of ambush predators waiting for the right moment to prey on the victims and break the bone of the household.The operation of to Closing down the school of early life(mother), and replace it with the morally corrupt, morally repugnant doctrine. Misguidance  has survived the same way light has survived. The differences between Noor and the false enlightenment is like  the myth behind the Olympic flame that needed to be re-lit using cigarette lighter after a rainstorm doused at 1976 Summer Olympics held in Montreal, Canada. and  the Volcano of Pompey The Four Great Women their light giant in a small wolrd.All we can do now is wait and anticipate what these women can bring to the table in times of despair.

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The Three Wise Monkeys

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What do you know about them ?The three wise monkeys symbolize those who hear no evil see no evil and speak no evil.Their simple hand to face gestures form the basis of the human deceit gestures. In simple terms , when we see , speak and hear lies or deceit, we are likely to attempt to cover our mouth, eyes or ears with our handsPeople who hear bad news or will often cover their entire face with their hands to symbolically stop themselves from seeing or hearing the awful news.

This attitude made us blind and negligent and most of the cases ignorant. They know it and that’s why they have such drive to continue to come with the Bad news and create bad news. Allah swt gives us bad news and urges us to pay heed to what will happen if you remain heedless, so why are behaving that way when it comes to worldly bad news simple its not natural, The industry is not natural.

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